The subject of anal sex is almost unavoidable in relationships. Whether it's a desire that comes from you or your partner, whether we talk about it at the beginning of the relationship or whether we take our time, we often don't know where to start.
That's why we wanted to answer all the questions you have about anal sex. In this article, we therefore approach the subject from several angles:
- Why try anal sex?
- What is important When do we try anal sex for the first time?
- How to prepare a sodomy?
- The 3 mantras for painless anal sex
As a preamble, we want to remind you that anal sex is not an obligation. We have the right to love or not, it's not a problem, we are all different. Above all, never let a partner convince you to have an anal relationship that you don't really want.
That being said, it is also important to be aware that anal sex is a completely normal practice. It is possible to have fun doing sodomy and it is possible to give it! This article is there precisely to give you the secrets to getting started with anal sex and to allow you to calmly discuss the subject with your partner.
Why try anal sex?
Pleasant practice when you do it right
As was quickly said above, anal sex is a standard practice that can provide a lot of pleasure. Indeed, when you are a woman, the pleasure obtained through anal sex is very different from the pleasure that you can feel during a classic vaginal penetration.
On the other hand, it is obvious that like the rest, anal sex “can be learned.” And to do that, you must therefore go step by step and have confidence in your partner. We talk about it just below.
It's not dirty as you might imagine
We often hear old hallway noises or gritty jokes in the evening that give a negative image to anal sex. Let's be honest: Yes, small accidents can happen and that is the reason why you have to trust your partner.
On the other hand, anal sex is not as dirty as you imagine: you forget the pools of excrement in the bed or on your partner's penis! When done at the right time and gently, anal sex is as clean a practice as any.
It is regularly offered by the partner
It is clear that there is a form of heightened fantasy, especially on the male side, when it comes to anal sex. This comes on the one hand from the porn culture that has shaped a generation with movie viewing and also from the fact that in the majority of cases the anal opening is in fact narrower than the vaginal opening.
So this mechanism sends the image of better pleasure (or in any case different) in men. The topic of trying anal sex can therefore quickly be put on the table. Also, when you meet a new partner and have already tried it, they will more easily dare to propose this practice.
What is important when trying anal sex?
Hygiene
Let's keep it simple: hygiene is essential when trying anal sex since we are talking about mucous membranes that come into contact with faeces. So, for men and women, we take a shower before engaging in anal sex. In both cases it's nicer for the partner. No abuse either, the key is to limit unpleasant odors and to do that in the best conditions.
Want to try sodomy
It seems obvious but I prefer to remind you. Sex doesn't matter, you only go when you're ready and you really want to. If the conversation has not been discussed before, you have the right to pause during the sexual act to think about it, talk about it, and to refuse. Even when you are used to practicing sodomy, there are some days that are not good days and when you don't want to. You have to communicate with your partner: gentlemen, ask the question to be 100% sure that it is ok. Ladies, if it's not your day say no to your partner and don't force yourself.
Communicate with your partner
To start, we recommend that you discuss the subject first. Trying to do anal without talking about it first is risky. So the objective is to Communicate about practice with his partner.
As with any good basis for open conversation, I invite you to ask open-ended questions: How do you feel about trying anal sex? How do you feel about this practice? Why do you want to? ... Also, to allow the other person to express themselves, bounce back on their answers and really listen to them without sticking to your positions.
Do it at the right time
At the right moment, you can understand several things. For example, I invite you not to practice sodomy after a heavy meal for obvious reasons that will not be detailed here:). Then, I advise you to do this when you are having a good day and also at a high point of excitement.
We're going slowly
This message is particularly aimed at our male readers: sodomy can be practiced gently! The anal opening and the anal canal are even more sensitive if it is the first time! We remind ourselves that the body was not originally intended for this purpose... So, we go easy and listen to the body and the words of our partner.
We protect ourselves
We prefer to specify: condoms are automatic! This is true for any type of sexual relationship and even more so when doing anal sex: in the anal canal there are microcracks that promote the transmission of germs (STIs, STDs...). The condom is automatic unless you are with a regular partner and have had your respective STI/STD tests!
If you need Tips for putting condoms on properly, it's over here.
Preparing the ground well
Sodomy in general and even more so the first sodomy, it's time to prepare! We give you all our tips to make your first sodomy go smoothly.
How to prepare a sodomy?
That's it, let's get to the heart of the matter;). Preparing for sodomy on a physical level is essential if we want it to go well. This is especially true when you try anal sex for the first time and these tips remain valid when you continue the practice. Personally, after 10 years of regular anal sex, I still apply these tips with my partner.
Preparing a sodomy with lubricant
We go with the lubricant generously. We take this opportunity to remind you that saliva has no lubricating power. It is therefore essential! As the lubricant compatible with condoms is the water-based one, we advise you to take this one as well. Personally, here is our favorite: a natural formula that is brand new: Le Bon Mojo coconut water-based lubricant that I love.
Start sodomy with one finger
When it's the first time, you go REALLY slowly. We start with just one finger: we make gentle movements, back and forth and we push the finger little by little, gently. When you feel that your partner is enjoying yourself, you can then try to go a little deeper or gently make circular movements to consider applying a second finger. It is only after the second, or even the third finger, that we can consider doing a complete anal penetration. We stop if there is pain.
Preparing for sodomy with an anal plug
After the finger step, it is interesting to use a more anal to prepare for sodomy. The difference is concrete since the most anal allows the anal opening to be enlarged and then facilitates penetration. Obviously when it comes to anal plugs, we try small sizes! To please your partner, you choose a cute anal jewel or an anal plug with a metal ball inside (it promotes sensations!).
In any case, we strongly recommend that you use this accessory that will make your life easier. Of course, we still recommend that you start with one or two fingers.
Preparing for sodomy alone.
If you want to try sodomy and you are afraid that it will hurt, but also if you are worried about discussing the subject with your partner, we strongly invite you to try it alone. To do this, apply the advice we gave you earlier and test yourself! Trust yourself! As a bonus, you will get to know your body and maybe even give yourself pleasure;). A little advice on the position side: you can squat to make the objective easier to reach.
The 3 mantras for painless anal sex
Finally, here are the 3 mantras to remember when doing anal sex:
- Lube you will always have
- Slowly you will start
- If you are in pain you will stop
With that, we hope you have a lot of fun as always! Learning to discover your body and opening yourself up to new pleasures can be very fun so think about it:).
